Jesus. You are worthy.

Guys. I’m not sure I can explain how much I love snow. The pure white canvas it paints over everything it touches. The cold weather it brings that requires scarves, gloves and hats. The new playground it brings. Goodness. I just love it!

However, today Atlanta is experiencing snow and ice that I don’t feel quite as joyous about. You see Uncle Steve, affectionately called Uncle Devie, passed away on Saturday. The pneumonia and staff were too much for his body, and he is in his eternal home now. Through the advice and help of so many friends, I was going to be on a plane right now to Atlanta. From there ride to Tennessee tonight and be with my family for the funeral tomorrow. The snow had different plans. So I am waiting, mostly patiently, just across from the airport to try and fly out tomorrow.

My soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young. For no one is cast off by the Lord forever. Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men.

 Lamentations 3:20-27, 31-33

The waiting is giving me time to process alone. To examine why and how much I want to be holding my family. I know I won't be able to make the funeral tomorrow. That does make me sad. My dad will be speaking. Dad has a gift with words, especially in hard times. He balances tenderness with his jokes and isn't afraid to show his heart through his tears. I love him all the more for that. Please be praying for my family through the blur of tomorrow and through the coming days as we remember and celebrate Uncle Devie. Thank you for those of you who have reached out through facebook, texts and calls. All are so appreciated. Please also pray that I can make the flight tomorrow.

I woke up today singing Yesu Unamanda, which means Jesus, you are worthy. It’s one of my favorite songs we sang in Zambia. My family has is not the only one with a loss. There have been so many beloved people in the last two weeks that have left this Earth. We grieve their lost presence here but celebrate with the angels knowing where they are. Through all of this hurt, we are blessed. Our God is faithful. He will provide what we need to get through the next hour or day. So right now, I chose to say, “Jesus. You are worthy.”

Before I finish, I want to share with you though are a few examples of our faithful God through the last few days…

• Even though I left my phone in Jinotega, there’s internet in the hotel. So I’ve been able to talk to family and friends through emails!
• Music and songs are some of the best medicine for my spirit and the clearest way of communicating to our Father. Come To Me by Bethel is a gem. Along with By My Side (Tenth Avenue North), All This Time (Britt Nicole) and Savior Please (Josh Wilson).
• Lilly and I have had plenty of laughs, mostly at ourselves, but all laughter is good.
• The North Americans at the mission have been so supportive in giving advice and helping me make the decision to go back to the States or stay in Nicaragua this week.
• A dear friend gave us a buddy pass to bring me to the State and took care of booking all of it for us!
• Psalm 40:11 As for you, O Lord, you will not restrain your mercy from me; your steadfast love and faithfulness will ever preserve me!SO thankful for the internet. It makes communication over multiple countries so simple.
• I had a successful meal speaking to the waiter only in Spanish. It’s the little victories.
• After 3 visits to the Claro store, I have a working Nicaraguan SIM card with minutes!
• Lilly and I got to go grocery shopping with the whole team at the big store on Sunday.
• Yesterday, I got to hold and rock a sleeping baby boy. Lucas is 4 months old and has a great smile- when he’s awake! I dare you to find something more comforting to me than holding a sleeping baby.